I don’t actually know “How to Write the Perfect First Message”, and since I’m being honest, the title of this post is mostly for SEO reasons.
I need this, no, WE need this to be a PSA for guys of the internet who are doing online dating, on how to send a first message.
Okay, I’m just going to admit it, and come out and say it.
The first thing you read in the post was a bold face lie.
Objective 1: Prove that you read her profile This is by far the most important objective, I would think female’s are looking for a guy that actually invested the time to read her profile before he decided to send her a message.
It’s actually slightly enraging to read some of these messages that these guys are sending to some of my female friends, only because all I can think is “HOW THIS IS MY COMPETITION!? Especially when I receive screen shots of first messages like the one below : I can’t even. That, somehow they are “beating the system” and not really having to do any work, other than craft a single super generic message and send it out dozens of times.
Because if they actually thought that the women they were sending the messages to knew that these were generic messages, they wouldn’t be sending them right?
I don’t know if I’m exactly qualified to do this, because my response rate is about 15%, but I consider myself above average emotional intelligence and understand, at least in theory, what women would like in first message. And like anything in my life, I probably approach sending messages on online with a little too much “engineering”.
Meaning I have objectives that I try to meet with each message that I send.
If I was being honest with the title of this post, I probably would have called it something like “How to write a good first message according to what Single Steve thinks is a good first message, but I’m not really sure you should take my advice because I rarely get responses to my messages”.
So, as you can see, it doesn’t really have the same ring, or appeal to someone searching on how to write a good first message for online dating.